Birds and the Bees -Official Relationship Thread-

[The Black Wolf]

I think you should be glad that you got rid of him BW.

I know you see it something like, "he's in jail for a reason. He's a no good, scumbag". Despite this, I don't hate him, but I hate what he did. I just wanted to give him a chance, because once he gets out nearly no one will give him a chance. No one was hardly writing him, only his family. No one outside his family gave him a chance.

I hope I don't regret ending or suspending our friendship. What if I was too hard on him? Maybe if I had stated I see him as a friend one more time, he would have stopped doing it and we would still be friends. I know I told him twice, but maybe he just didn't take the warning serious. I don't know. I hope to God I didn't end a friendship unecessarily.

[Wrath]

I know you see it something like, "he's in jail for a reason. He's a no good, scumbag". Despite this, I don't hate him, but I hate what he did. I just wanted to give him a chance, because once he gets out nearly no one will give him a chance. No one was hardly writing him, only his family. No one outside his family gave him a chance.

Don't give him a chance. Let him rot and be hated by everyone. He's clearly a no-good wannabe gangster that doesn't deserve any sympathy.

Trust me, he's gonna be in back in prison in no time.

[play_b3yond_313]

Ok so heres my deal:

Ive had this friends for more than a year now, and seems like Im established in the mighty "friendzone". A while ago she broke up with her boyfriend, who I am really good friends with and she has been with 1 guys for a couple of weeks, but have since broken it off. I havent talked to her in a month or so, but saw her 2 days ago for the first time since and I was really happy to see her and be around her.

Last summer we spent a bit of time together while she studied for summer school and spent some good of that close. We would go to the park and she would rest her head on my stomach while we talked and such. Anyways, I have always told myself I dont have feelings for this girl but since last time I saw her not so sure I want to keep lying to my self. I dont really want to get together with her as a coupe, but hooking up and hanging out once in a while is what I would want really.

So basically, do I spill the beans now or not bother. The more the days go on the more I want to say something, but if anything were to happen I dont want it to ruin my friendship with her now ex :/ UGH

[Molo316]

Ok so heres my deal:

Ive had this friends for more than a year now, and seems like Im established in the mighty "friendzone". A while ago she broke up with her boyfriend, who I am really good friends with and she has been with 1 guys for a couple of weeks, but have since broken it off. I havent talked to her in a month or so, but saw her 2 days ago for the first time since and I was really happy to see her and be around her.

Last summer we spent a bit of time together while she studied for summer school and spent some good of that close. We would go to the park and she would rest her head on my stomach while we talked and such. Anyways, I have always told myself I dont have feelings for this girl but since last time I saw her not so sure I want to keep lying to my self. I dont really want to get together with her as a coupe, but hooking up and hanging out once in a while is what I would want really.

So basically, do I spill the beans now or not bother. The more the days go on the more I want to say something, but if anything were to happen I dont want it to ruin my friendship with her now ex :/ UGH

My perspective, as I've been in the same situation: who offers you more? Who are you closer to?

I was mates with a bloke on my course at uni and he introduced me to his then-girlfriend. Eventually, they broke up and she kept chatting to me. As things went on I discovered that his way of living life and thinking was a way that I don't agree with and I basically realised he was a knob. I said to myself that I wouldn't make a play for her just out of respect really, and at the time I never fancied her.
After a while she asked me if I wanted to hang out. I went and after a while I began to like her (like the general muppet that I am). I still felt bad because if I made a play for her then I felt as though I'd be being a git to the guy, but in the meantime he was telling me that he was over her and that he was shagging other birds left, right and centre, so I came to the conclusion that if I got with her that it wouldn't make a difference to him, and that if he was over her, like he said he was, it shouldn't bother him at all and it shouldn't have been any of his business.

Anyway, he saw pictures of me and her gang hanging out (via Facebook) and basically got the hump with me because I was hanging out with her, and just because he introduced us. I thought he was pathetic and I continued to hang out with her, but in the end I never made a real play for her and I don't think we would have worked out even if I did try because we're two completely different people. But my point to this is that I didn't get much from him, as we weren't ever really "tight" buddies, his attitude stunk and he only seemed to talk about himself to me, whereas her, she (at the time) kept asking about me, asked if I wanted to hang out and just chatted to me in general like clockwork. In the end, she had more to offer.

However, if you are really good friends with the guy then (if it were me) I wouldn't go for it.
Think about that! If you feel lousy about it and still want to come clean to her then I suppose that is was you want to do deep down. Go with your gut.

[yourmumsface17]

I feel the need to rant about something

Right my girlfriends uncles is coming down today (I knew he MIGHT have been, but there was no confirmation or anything) This morning the gf texts me saying "I'm coming over to yours see you in a bit" or something, I'm like great, my mum then asks me to look after my sister, I thought fine, she can hang out with us and we can go do something.

My gf then texts me saying the uncle is coming down and I have to go to hers, I say I can't I've just agreed to look after my sister, she flips out goes on about how I didn't offer to go over there (She texted me first thing in the morning telling me she is coming over) and she says I don't wanna go over to see her family, I explain I am not psychic and I thought she was just coming over and we could do something with my sister, she flips out and goes crazy at me.

I hate relationships sometimes

[Thorzilla]

I feel the need to rant about something

Right my girlfriends uncles is coming down today (I knew he MIGHT have been, but there was no confirmation or anything) This morning the gf texts me saying "I'm coming over to yours see you in a bit" or something, I'm like great, my mum then asks me to look after my sister, I thought fine, she can hang out with us and we can go do something.

My gf then texts me saying the uncle is coming down and I have to go to hers, I say I can't I've just agreed to look after my sister, she flips out goes on about how I didn't offer to go over there (She texted me first thing in the morning telling me she is coming over) and she says I don't wanna go over to see her family, I explain I am not psychic and I thought she was just coming over and we could do something with my sister, she flips out and goes crazy at me.

I hate relationships sometimes

I can totally relate to that
Just let it like that. She'll have to understand sooner or later that you made a commitment to your mum and you're not going to break it for her. Stand your ground bro, or this will be one of many more!

[PeanutButterMunky]

Women are inherently evil, even if they don't think so themselves. /end

[yourmumsface17]

I can totally relate to that
Just let it like that. She'll have to understand sooner or later that you made a commitment to your mum and you're not going to break it for her. Stand your ground bro, or this will be one of many more!

I ignored and she apoligised a rare victory for men everywhere!


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[The Black Wolf]

I have a question.

Someone told me when a guy mocks you (does what you do, the way you do it) it can be considered flirting. If you ignore it and don't respond, that's when they start messing with you for real. The guy who told me this was an older guy and he knows boys because he was once a boy himself.

My questions are:
1. Is it true that imitation can be used as flirting?
2. If you don't respond to a guy who flirts with you a lot, will he turn on you or just start making your life miserable? Is that possible?

[Dave-The-Rave]

I move on if there is no interest...though I have sense.

[Thorzilla]

I have a question.

Someone told me when a guy mocks you (does what you do, the way you do it) it can be considered flirting. If you ignore it and don't respond, that's when they start messing with you for real. The guy who told me this was an older guy and he knows boys because he was once a boy himself.

My questions are:
1. Is it true that imitation can be used as flirting?
2. If you don't respond to a guy who flirts with you a lot, will he turn on you or just start making your life miserable? Is that possible?

Set things straight and tell him to cut it out. It's probably going to surprise him more than make him angry.

[Sufi]

I have a question.

Someone told me when a guy mocks you (does what you do, the way you do it) it can be considered flirting. If you ignore it and don't respond, that's when they start messing with you for real. The guy who told me this was an older guy and he knows boys because he was once a boy himself.

My questions are:
1. Is it true that imitation can be used as flirting?
2. If you don't respond to a guy who flirts with you a lot, will he turn on you or just start making your life miserable? Is that possible?

1. Anything could be flirtation, it just depends on how it was done.
2. Not likely. Unless the guy is fucked up. You'll probably know to stay away before anything happens.

I'm surprised someone told you this to be taken seriously lol.

I'd stay away from the guy who told you this.

I feel the need to rant about something

Right my girlfriends uncles is coming down today (I knew he MIGHT have been, but there was no confirmation or anything) This morning the gf texts me saying "I'm coming over to yours see you in a bit" or something, I'm like great, my mum then asks me to look after my sister, I thought fine, she can hang out with us and we can go do something.

My gf then texts me saying the uncle is coming down and I have to go to hers, I say I can't I've just agreed to look after my sister, she flips out goes on about how I didn't offer to go over there (She texted me first thing in the morning telling me she is coming over) and she says I don't wanna go over to see her family, I explain I am not psychic and I thought she was just coming over and we could do something with my sister, she flips out and goes crazy at me.

I hate relationships sometimes

I would dump the **** *****

[The Black Wolf]

Thank you guys!

[Dave-The-Rave]

So I've been debating for a while now if I should post about this or not.

Im doing something stupid atm, starting to have feelings for one of my friends who is sort of a "player" type I think. She is flirty with me and always seems happy when she sees me (hugs and everything), but I think she acts this way with everyone. Everytime we go out with friends clubbing we have an awesome time dancing and everything, though that is as far as it gos..she usually dissapears before the end of the night and I don't see her again.

I've been very aware of this fact, she might not just be the girlfriend type and although I tell myself to just be friends because we get on well my mind keeps going back to wanting more. My brain tells me we probably wouldn't work well together, but she is just fun to be around.

Just tired of being single in general though..I work much better in a couple.

So this is still about the same girl, sometime has passed and I've gotten to know her more..I don't think she is the "player" type anymore, I just don't think she likes getting into serious stuff very often. So what happened was I followed my own advice and decided to just be friends with her which has worked out fine. I have been at home for almost a month now (Easter break) and in that time we have suddenly been talking a lot more than before (Texts/Facebook chat). On a night out just before we left we ended up kissing (We were both drunk and haven't mentioned it since).

The thing is now we have started talking a lot more we've realised we actually have a lot in common..like music tastes, videogames and movies. This makes me like her more naturally, but I get the feeling this might be doing me more harm than good..I get the feeling I might be getting permanently "friendzoned".

I go back tomorrow and I will be meeting up with her and some other friends for a night out that has been planned for a few weeks now. I have no idea how I should play this, I don't know for sure if I am in the friendzone..but it all could depend on how tomorrow night goes.

Any advice/tips?

EDIT: I should also add, we've been making plans to hangout watch films and play games when we get back..sounds like something friends would do.

[Sufi]

So I've been debating for a while now if I should post about this or not.



So this is still about the same girl, sometime has passed and I've gotten to know her more..I don't think she is the "player" type anymore, I just don't think she likes getting into serious stuff very often. So what happened was I followed my own advice and decided to just be friends with her which has worked out fine. I have been at home for almost a month now (Easter break) and in that time we have suddenly been talking a lot more than before (Texts/Facebook chat). On a night out just before we left we ended up kissing (We were both drunk and haven't mentioned it since).

The thing is now we have started talking a lot more we've realised we actually have a lot in common..like music tastes, videogames and movies. This makes me like her more naturally, but I get the feeling this might be doing me more harm than good..I get the feeling I might be getting permanently "friendzoned".

I go back tomorrow and I will be meeting up with her and some other friends for a night out that has been planned for a few weeks now. I have no idea how I should play this, I don't know for sure if I am in the friendzone..but it all could depend on how tomorrow night goes.

Any advice/tips?

EDIT: I should also add, we've been making plans to hangout watch films and play games when we get back..sounds like something friends would do.

Go for it. You're 22, you will have a lot of time to think about serious stuff later on.

[Molo316]

Go for it. You're 22, you will have a lot of time to think about serious stuff later on.

Agreed.

I wish I could do this. I think that way but I don't do it. But I recommend you and others do it. Serious stuff is for later on.

[Sufi]

It's really rare for something that will last a life time so I say enjoy whatever life throws at you and hope for the best.

[The Black Wolf]

Agreed.

I wish I could do this. I think that way but I don't do it. But I recommend you and others do it. Serious stuff is for later on.

Can I ask why serious stuff is for later on? I'm not bashing men or anything, but I'm just wondering. If you met your soul mate or fell in love, but you were in your twenties, you wouldn't want to settle down then and there?

I have another question about men. If you see a guy you like or interested in, how do you approach him? Do you get to know him first and become a friend, then make your intentions clear? Or can you just go right up to him and tell him you're interested in dating?

[Molo316]

Can I ask why serious stuff is for later on? I'm not bashing men or anything, but I'm just wondering. If you met your soul mate or fell in love, but you were in your twenties, you wouldn't want to settle down then and there?

I have another question about men. If you see a guy you like or interested in, how do you approach him? Do you get to know him first and become a friend, then make your intentions clear? Or can you just go right up to him and tell him you're interested in dating?

Point 1: in my experience of reading things on here, the younger members seem to over-think things, as do I. So based on that belief, I reckon that when you're young you should enjoy yourself, but when I say that I do not mean sleep around wrecklessly. Get with a boy/girl and enjoy yourselves. If the two of you stay together long enough and the relationship blossoms then who knows where that can you the two of you. But I wouldn't recommend setting out to look for a soulmate when you are young because you're only going to get burnt - that is based on personal experience too.

Point 2: whilst I would love for a girl to come up to me and tell me that they like me and are interested in dating, as I'm sure a lot of other guys on here would too, as girls are one of the hardest things to read, I think that if a girl just came up to me straight up and said that I would be a little freaked out.

[The Black Wolf]

Point 1: in my experience of reading things on here, the younger members seem to over-think things, as do I. So based on that belief, I reckon that when you're young you should enjoy yourself, but when I say that I do not mean sleep around wrecklessly. Get with a boy/girl and enjoy yourselves. If the two of you stay together long enough and the relationship blossoms then who knows where that can you the two of you. But I wouldn't recommend setting out to look for a soulmate when you are young because you're only going to get burnt - that is based on personal experience too.

Point 2: whilst I would love for a girl to come up to me and tell me that they like me and are interested in dating, as I'm sure a lot of other guys on here would too, as girls are one of the hardest things to read, I think that if a girl just came up to me straight up and said that I would be a little freaked out.

Okay, thank you.

Just starting out as friends might be the best way any way, get to know him and see how he is alone and around his friends.

[Molo316]

Okay, thank you.

Just starting out as friends might be the best way any way, get to know him and see how he is alone and around his friends.

You're welcome.

That sounds wise. Blokes can act completely different when they are alone. You'll most likely see the real them, unless they are an egotistic douche who always cares about their street cred 24/7.

[Sufi]

Can I ask why serious stuff is for later on? I'm not bashing men or anything, but I'm just wondering. If you met your soul mate or fell in love, but you were in your twenties, you wouldn't want to settle down then and there?

The problem is that most likely that'll not happen. So you'd be wasting your time.

Not only that, you don't know who your soul mate is until you've had a child with them especially when you only have each other and no one else to help you. lol.

A relationship without a child, I feel imo is a boat that hasn't seen thunder.

[admartian]

So I've been debating for a while now if I should post about this or not.



So this is still about the same girl, sometime has passed and I've gotten to know her more..I don't think she is the "player" type anymore, I just don't think she likes getting into serious stuff very often. So what happened was I followed my own advice and decided to just be friends with her which has worked out fine. I have been at home for almost a month now (Easter break) and in that time we have suddenly been talking a lot more than before (Texts/Facebook chat). On a night out just before we left we ended up kissing (We were both drunk and haven't mentioned it since).

The thing is now we have started talking a lot more we've realised we actually have a lot in common..like music tastes, videogames and movies. This makes me like her more naturally, but I get the feeling this might be doing me more harm than good..I get the feeling I might be getting permanently "friendzoned".

I go back tomorrow and I will be meeting up with her and some other friends for a night out that has been planned for a few weeks now. I have no idea how I should play this, I don't know for sure if I am in the friendzone..but it all could depend on how tomorrow night goes.

Any advice/tips?

EDIT: I should also add, we've been making plans to hangout watch films and play games when we get back..sounds like something friends would do.

Girls who are 'touchy feely' and real 'buddy buddy' with guys, are hard to read a lot of the time.

I'd be cautious in assuming anything unless you learn more about her feelings.

[Sir_Scud]

Girls who are 'touchy feely' and real 'buddy buddy' with guys, are hard to read a lot of the time.

I'd be cautious in assuming anything unless you learn more about her feelings.

This is so true. You can never be certain with these types of girls.

@Dave

Just continue hanging out with her and try not to look too deep into it yet. I'd say she at least finds you attractive enough to kiss. Whether or not to date is a whole different story. Tomorrow night doesn't have to be the big determiner either. Just go have fun. I assume you haven't seen her since break? Maybe your feelings will change once you see her in person.

Really there isn't much to say. You seem to be taking a shine to her, but it seems more out of convenience than anything else. You said yourself in the quote you work better as a couple and that you're tired of being single. I think you like the idea of her more than the person herself. I could be wrong, hard to analyze everything through 2 posts and not trying to sound harsh.

I guess my question is, what are you looking for? Does she really fit it? If not you're only hurting yourself if she isn't interested. Long story short, if you're just looking for some fun, I bet you could win her over. If you want something more serious, this situation doesn't really sound like it.

[Beast of Bourbon]

I think alot guys that are on facebook make the mistake and chat with the girl hours on end.
Let her chat with her friends and not with you (remember you are not friendmaterial, you are a fucker).
You have to stay interesting and kinda "mysterious" - girls are intrigued by that.

If i was you Dave í wouldn't contact her again before you go out again.
Let her fry a bit and let the juice do it's thing