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  1. #3501
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    So hard trying to keep myself together right now, my meltdown on Friday/Saturday took a lot out of me..but I have to hold it together until I get my work done on Thursday before I can finally just let myself fall apart a bit a get some actual rest.

    It feels like on Friday when I go home I'll probably just sleep for 2 days straight, I don't think I've felt exhaustion like this in a long time. I'm hoping I just need some rest.
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  2. #3502
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    Sorry to hear that man. It sounds like you just need some time out of that environment. You'll probably feel better at home after awhile.

    @jaeger, before you know it you'll be 4-0, 5-0, 6-0...until you lose count


  3. #3503
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    So yeah, all this time back home was just what the doctor ordered for me to get over my little freak out. I came to realise the reason that all happened was because I am about to enter my final term of university. Pretty soon I'll be well and truly out on my own, only this time I won't be surrounded by my peers and people my own age which scares the hell out of me..I'll probably end up moving to yet another new city as well to pursue a job. The whole thing with this girl was me desperately trying to cling onto this part of my life that is rapidly dissapearing.

    So I've got a genuine question for the older members here who may have already gone through what I'm going through right now. After you finished uni/college and perhaps moved to a new city, how did you build a new social circle when it wasn't so easy to find people of a similar age..also how did you meet women and potential dates when you couldn't really go out to bars and clubs every night of the week? I just have this fear now that I'll be living all by myself with no friends and only work colleagues who will probably be much older than me.
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  4. #3504
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir_Scud View Post
    Jaeger, before you know it you'll be 4-0, 5-0, 6-0...until you lose count.
    I wish that was the case. Unfortunately, things with that girl quickly turned sour and the flame died. We still text each other but that's about as much as we do. Although we did have a slightly awkward run in up town. I'm now speaking to another girl I met through OKCupid, and we're going out on Tuesday.

    Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.


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    OKCupid...had a friend use that, can't say with the best results. Sucks it didn't work out man. Wish you luck with your meet!

    @Dave, I got out of college last year. I stayed somewhat nearby, but yes, I basically lost contact with everyone I knew. Save for a friend or two. I still go out to the bars every now and then, but honestly, it's not as fun for me. That whole aspect just kinda died once I was out of college. I still like to drink every now and then, but I'm not stumbling home from a night on the town really.

    At work, people are mainly much older than me. I'm the young blood in the office, so not much for me there. I know that phase you're in, all the things in life are about to change rapidly, but just gotta let things play out. You might still have friends nearby, etc. And really, there's no shame in online dating. Something I would've turned to had I not met someone before leaving college. You'll only become a crazy cat person if you're a weird, recluse creeper man.


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  7. #3506
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sir_Scud View Post
    OKCupid...had a friend use that, can't say with the best results. Sucks it didn't work out man. Wish you luck with your meet!
    Yeah, OKCupid is varied to say the least. I initially used it for quick hook ups and one-night stands but started using it for casual dating and went from there. The girl I'm meeting on Tuesday seems pretty sound (she doesn't seem insane like the girls I usually attract, which is a bonus) and she's pretty freakin' fit.

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  8. #3507
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dave-The-Rave View Post
    So yeah, all this time back home was just what the doctor ordered for me to get over my little freak out. I came to realise the reason that all happened was because I am about to enter my final term of university. Pretty soon I'll be well and truly out on my own, only this time I won't be surrounded by my peers and people my own age which scares the hell out of me..I'll probably end up moving to yet another new city as well to pursue a job. The whole thing with this girl was me desperately trying to cling onto this part of my life that is rapidly dissapearing.

    So I've got a genuine question for the older members here who may have already gone through what I'm going through right now. After you finished uni/college and perhaps moved to a new city, how did you build a new social circle when it wasn't so easy to find people of a similar age..also how did you meet women and potential dates when you couldn't really go out to bars and clubs every night of the week? I just have this fear now that I'll be living all by myself with no friends and only work colleagues who will probably be much older than me.
    I went thru that after college. You have alot of options typically what people do is hang out with co workers, meet people out at social events and bars its not easy but depending on your personality and willingness to speak to strangers.

    The hardest part is trying to build a circle of friends once you do then other things will fall into place in the meantime like i did focus on building yourself up and getting settled.

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  9. #3508
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    Relating to what Dave asked, what kind of online dating programs do people use? It seems like most suck and you have to shell out a pretty decent amount of money to use it with any sort of success.

    I'm not quite at that stage Dave, I've got a few more years of college left but I'm sorry you hear you're having a tough time. I've still kept in contact with a couple people from high school and I hope that carries on. Most people from high school I don't talk to and honestly didn't even like.
    Last edited by podsaurus; 04-20-2013 at 23:16.

  10. #3509
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    Ive toyed with some over the years but never really met anyone worth while on dating sites

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  11. #3510
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    So on a whim I joined that Plenty of Fish website today mostly because it is free. I gotta say it does a good job of putting me in a good mood, already got a few email alerts from it saying girls were interested and some of them are actually attractive and interesting sounding.

    Not going to act on anything for now though. I need to figure out what I'm doing with myself first, I'm in England right now but I could easily find myself back in Ireland in a couple of months once I graduate.
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  12. #3511
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dave-The-Rave View Post
    So on a whim I joined that Plenty of Fish website today mostly because it is free. I gotta say it does a good job of putting me in a good mood, already got a few email alerts from it saying girls were interested and some of them are actually attractive and interesting sounding.

    Not going to act on anything for now though. I need to figure out what I'm doing with myself first, I'm in England right now but I could easily find myself back in Ireland in a couple of months once I graduate.
    Be careful. I found out from my experience on Plenty of Fish that there are some weird people on the site. Don't be shocked if a crazy girl starts messaging you every minute.

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  13. #3512
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    Plenty Of Fish, I'd say, is better to use for hookups and one-night stands as opposed to finding girlfriend material - thats best left for OKCupid.

    Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.


  14. #3513
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    It all depends how you setup your profile though...and crazies can always be blocked from contacting you.
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  15. #3514
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    Birds and the Bees -Official Relationship Thread-

    Every girl that has ever messages me on one of those sites have been fat or skanky.....

    Nothing beats in person interaction

    ~~~OLD SKOOL~~~

  16. #3515
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    I get off of school early on certain days, so today I decided to run straight to the florist and buy her some flowers. Left them on her door with a little note attached.
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  18. #3516
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    ...unfortunately, she has been without her phone for a couple of days, so I have no idea if she got them. Cool beans.
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  19. #3517
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    Quote Originally Posted by DeviousOne View Post
    Every girl that has ever messages me on one of those sites have been fat or skanky.....

    Nothing beats in person interaction
    I've got a few ugly ones replying which I just ignore, but I've got a few potential good ones too. Not really replying to anyone yet though, I don't know where I'll be living a month from now so I'm going to wait until I know where I'll be.
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  20. #3518
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    OK, so it looks like the game is up for me and that one girl. 3-1 ain't bad, I'll admit, but it kinda sucks as I was beginning to really like her. We had that connection but, alas, it looks like it wasn't enough. Her commitments and my commitments just seemed to clash. Nevermind, onwards and upwards as they say, and on to the next fish in the sea - which, quite conveniently, is found in my new training group at work. I'm going to have to plan how to work this one as the situation is quite, well, complex - and things could get nasty rather quickly.

    Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.


  21. #3519
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    Sounds like a complication situation best to just let it go and you never know it may work in the future....In the meantime time to go fishing! lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by DeviousOne View Post
    Sounds like a complicated situation, best to just let it go and you never know it may work in the future...
    I'll give a brief rundown.

    Her name, for the sake of privacy, is X. X is part of the training group I'm in at my new job. She's a year younger than me and, truth be told, is gorgeous. Due to the nature of our jobs, we know a fair about each other (the group in general, not just X and myself) and she seems genuinely awesome. X sits opposite me (we sit on a oval table) and we're always chatting about anything and everything. As the week has gone, we chatted more and more - again, as a group, but also X and myself.

    One of the things that came up is the fact that X has a boyfriend of three years. That'd usually put a stop to everything but, well, he's in jail for undisclosed reasons. So, as far as I'm concerned, she's fair game. The only other thing that was making me hesitant is Y, a guy who sits next to me. Y is sound as $#@! but everyone was under the assumption that X and Y were flirting. However, over a talk we had the other night, X doesn't see Y that way. Her boyfriend is the complete opposite to Y - whereas Y is slim and athletic, X's boyfriend is, in her words, short and fat - which bodes well for me, as I'm certainly not a looker.

    But yeah, it's just the boyfriend thing. He's out in a bit but the question is, if I was to, er, have a go, would he go after me or do you reckon it would stay quiet? Are office 'flings' dangerous? I don't know, man.

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  23. #3521
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaeger View Post
    I'll give a brief rundown.

    Her name, for the sake of privacy, is X. X is part of the training group I'm in at my new job. She's a year younger than me and, truth be told, is gorgeous. Due to the nature of our jobs, we know a fair about each other (the group in general, not just X and myself) and she seems genuinely awesome. X sits opposite me (we sit on a oval table) and we're always chatting about anything and everything. As the week has gone, we chatted more and more - again, as a group, but also X and myself.

    One of the things that came up is the fact that X has a boyfriend of three years. That'd usually put a stop to everything but, well, he's in jail for undisclosed reasons. So, as far as I'm concerned, she's fair game. The only other thing that was making me hesitant is Y, a guy who sits next to me. Y is sound as $#@! but everyone was under the assumption that X and Y were flirting. However, over a talk we had the other night, X doesn't see Y that way. Her boyfriend is the complete opposite to Y - whereas Y is slim and athletic, X's boyfriend is, in her words, short and fat - which bodes well for me, as I'm certainly not a looker.

    But yeah, it's just the boyfriend thing. He's out in a bit but the question is, if I was to, er, have a go, would he go after me or do you reckon it would stay quiet? Are office 'flings' dangerous? I don't know, man.
    Yes, I do believe an office fling in that situation could be dangerous.

    My big brother back in high school was in a relationship with a girl with the same situation. Her boyfriend was getting out of jail and was a known drug dealer. My big brother had to leave the girl alone because the drug dealer started threatening him.

    I would gauge it on how the girl feels. She's still with him in jail, so that seems like she's pretty committed to him.

    I wish you luck on whatever you do.

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  24. #3522
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Black Wolf View Post
    My big brother back in high school was in a relationship with a girl with the same situation. Her boyfriend was getting out of jail and was a known drug dealer. My big brother had to leave the girl alone because the drug dealer started threatening him.

    I would gauge it on how the girl feels. She's still with him in jail, so that seems like she's pretty committed to him.
    Trust me, some of the stories that X is coming out with...she can't be that committed, just saying.

    Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.


  25. #3523
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaeger View Post
    Trust me, some of the stories that X is coming out with...she can't be that committed, just saying.
    But she's still with him. She still classifies herself as in a relationship with him.

    I don't know everything about the situation, but I wish you luck.

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  26. #3524
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Black Wolf View Post
    But she's still with him. She still classifies herself as in a relationship with him.

    I don't know everything about the situation, but I wish you luck.
    As I just said, some of the stuff she comes out with only goes to prove that she is nowhere near as committed as you think she is. She might be with him, but it doesn't mean she's with him exclusively.

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  27. #3525
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jaeger View Post
    I just don't want to come across as needy or something, aha.
    I haven't been following this thread, so I just read the last five pages. I was curious about this post...

    Is it customary for the girl to ask out the guy in Europe/UK? Because from what I understand, the guy is supposed to set up the dates. Hell, one of the biggest pieces of advice people usually give on dating is to make the decisions, since girls don't like having to handle everything. It also makes you seem confident.

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