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  1. #1
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    Battleship the Movie or "How Humanity Abuses Visitors"

    This was a movie with US Navy approval and resources about how we should strong arm visitors and blow them up with cruise missiles..While systematically exchanging high fives with our military allies (Japan).

    1. The aliens lost their communication ship in orbit (apparently a tiny ass satellite made it EXPLODE).

    2. Upon landing, in the Ocean, the aliens establish a 'safe zone' with a force field and accidentally trap three destroyer class vessels (Japan and US militaries).

    3. The group, headed by the US Navy, attempts to communicate with the advanced visitors by way of using (primative) radio transmissions and human frequencies. Perhaps unsurprisingly this didn't work. Basically they said stuff like "Unidentified vessel, identify yourself." Yea, nice.

    4. Aliens surface to observe the combined US/JAP fleet and proceed to do absolutely NOTHING but hold a defensive position around their field generator.

    5. Humans blast their horns in an attempt to signal alien craft.

    6. Aliens do the same.

    7. The humans FIRE at the aliens who are simply sitting there, placing a grazing shot across one of their wings.*

    8. Aliens target ONLY the turret of the ship that fired and blow it up.

    9. Rihanna, in a period of pure genius, unloads a mini-gun at the enormous alien ship at point blank range on a tiny rubber craft.

    10. Humans make more aggressive actions. Aliens blow up one ship. Just one.

    11. Emo-tard main character, who lost his brother on that ONE ship that was blown up, charges the alien defensive formation and readies weapons.

    12. Japanese ship backs up US ship and FIRES at the alien vessels. It is then destroyed.

    13. US Vessel gets cold feet and turns away. Aliens spare it and pursue ZERO offensive measures against ship.

    14. Aliens cut off all ways of reaching a satellite uplink location by blowing up bridges and destroying military landed aircraft. In this scene the aliens go to GREAT LENGTH to avoid harming -ANY- non combatants or humans (apart from those manning military aircraft) at the time.

    They do this because their communication craft was destroyed in orbit and the natives are CLEARLY hostile to them.

    Throughout this entire movie, the aliens are shown to never offensively engage humans. Almost, if not all, actions taken were entirely defensive. Even when they board the remaining US Destroyer to rescue one of their own (who fell into the sea) that is being held by Navy personnel, the alien shock troops do not harm anybody in the room and are shown to scan each human and determine they are not to be harmed.

    All those injured or killed subsequently is entirely due to excessive and repeated hostile measures against the visitors. Like punching one in the face, getting knocked down (and not harmed) getting back up and hitting it with a fire axe and then getting tossed across the room. And not killed.

    This was after the alien walked up and looked at the navy engineer for a few moments, did a little scan thing that basically said he was not to be hurt, and casually walked past him towards his objective: disabling the ships engine. Again, not exactly offensive is it? These human creatures shot at them unprovoked and rather than blow up an entire ship.. They'd rather disable it.

    The only exceptions being a handful of characters that were killed off screen, but no details were given. The majority of these off screen characters were definitively armed and/or trained military personnel. Not including the scientists lab assistant, but the details were not given.

    The most confusing part of this film, the one that finally lead me to believe that the script writers were clearly not sure if the aliens should be portrayed as villains (or had a mental breakdown during a write session) was when the scientist runs back into his alien overrun labratory on an island to retrieve a communications device.. And is spotted by an Alien technician\scientist. The human scientist is so terrified that he's shaking badly enough to make the device he's holding rattle The alien walks up to him, looks him in the eye (shows it from its point of view as well) and calmly places his hand on the scientists communications equipment (housed in a brief case) steadying it. Making the shaking noise stop and looking at the human reassuringly.

    The human scientist is then allowed to leave without so much as an alarm being raised by the Alien technician.

    W.T.F. can this scene be meant to convey other than the fact that the aliens are not overly aggressive? I mean, all scenes are put in a movie deliberately. They're shot, and reshot, and the special effects for this movie (which are pretty good imo) had to be carefully done per scene as well. All the Aliens are CG.

    So what was the director and the writers thinking here? I felt zero sympathy for the humans. Yet clearly this movie was meant to be a "OOH-RAH MILITARY KILL ALIEN INVADERS" Independence Day/Battle L.A. type flick.

    Seriously, why would the DOD and Navy spend US tax dollars on this and give the movie their seal of approval. It paints them as warmongering xenophobes who engage in overtly aggressive actions against alien visitors.

    Now, I'm not saying that my interpretation of the events is how Battleship was MEANT to go down on the big screen. But the script did a damn fine job in making me strongly sympathetic towards the aliens and it could be argued (lol) that the events of this film were nothing but humans being completely bellicose.

    Yes, I'm irritated. This is my review of "Battleship".

    *They did this, from what I can tell, in international waters. There was a big multinational joint training op there at the time with militaries from around the world (China, US, Russia, UK, Japan, etc). Why in the hell would you pursue such an offensive course of action given all of this information, let alone against crafts in question that were quite likely to be (and were) extraterrestrial?
    Last edited by Vulgotha; 05-24-2012 at 07:12.


  2. #2
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    I'll read this fully later. For now, this is one giant Come on Vulgotha, it's your own fault for seeing this movie.

  3. #3
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    Dude, spoiler alert!!!



    nah just kidding, I won't be seeing it

    You should add these points to the "100 things I learned from Battleship thread" on IMDB


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    You make a lot of good points in this. The biggest thing for me was that the humans were sending messages to the alien's planet (basically initiating contact with the aliens) and when the aliens come to earth we decide to fight them. Doesn't make that much sense to me.
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  5. #5
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  6. #6
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    Ah yes, Battle$#@!, what a loud and annoying film that was. Just thinking about it is giving me a headache, what in gods name was Liam Neeson thinking?!


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  7. #7
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    After watching The Grey, I understand him grabbing this easy paycheck.

  8. #8
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    Your telling of the movie actually makes it sound somewhat interesting as I'm fascinated by the concept of human and alien social and military interaction. It sounds like the humans were a bunch of gun-toting morons who do not know the definitions of the word mutual and cooperation.
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  9. #9
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    That's actually a big reason that I initially liked the first half of the movie. Until I basically realized that this interesting and relatively unexplored dynamic was either accidental or they decided NOT to fully develop it.

    They jump the shark in the movie the second a handful of Navy sailors and some old WW2 museum curators 'restore' the USS Missouri (WW2 Battleship) in a rocky montage like sequence and then proceed to blow up the alien mothership in a 1v1 confrontation.

    And then the movie just 'ends'. "YAY WE KILLED THE NON AGGRESSIVE VISITORS, CUT TO A STARS WARS MEDAL AWARD CEREMONY LIKE SESSION WITH LIAM NEESON"


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    The only detail: After being attacked the aliens thorw those metal balls that search and destroy an army base and a highway full of cars. That seemed... aggressive. Maybe they were eliminating potential threats? Then why the highway?

    Also there is a half assed telephatic communciation between spoiled brat/hero and an alien where 2 seconds flashbacks shows us the aliens are ...sort of warriors. Humasn would not be shown in kindler light.

    Anyway, great effects, spectacular soundtrack, still sucks.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by TEJ2025 View Post
    The biggest thing for me was that the humans were sending messages to the alien's planet (basically initiating contact with the aliens) and when the aliens come to earth we decide to fight them.
    Something to this effect really, really bugged me about The Day the Earth Stood Still.

    Some secretary of defense woman says, "They took down our satellites and defenses, I don't know about you but that seems hostile." Or something to that effect. And then one of the scientists, maybe Connelly, says something like "Maybe they don't want to be shot at."

    Why does government and military always have to be against things? One of the only movies where aliens are actually treated with respect is Close Encounters of the Third Kind. What the hell happened to that generation of genius?

    Men in Black is I think the only other movie were aliens are necessarily evil, or not all of them. And now that one turned into a cheese-fest.

  12. #12
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    Yeah, but I don't care.

    I'm team people.

    If a Mass Effect universe ever happens in real life, then I'd be up for a more patient and communicative endeavour (i.e. avoiding the First contact War) with aliens, but if they show any hostile tendencies, we'd be right to be aggressive.

    There comes to a point, where you have to back your Sapien-bretheren.

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