Max Payne may be depressed and fed up with his life, spending a large chunk of his latest adventure moaning and feeling sorry for himself, but he also has a very dry sense of humour and dishes out some memorable quotes throughout the 10 hour campaign.
We’ve gathered together some of our favourite quotes from Max Payne 3 for you to enjoy.
“I was a dumb American in a place where dumb Americans were less popular than the clap.”
“I didn’t know what to think any more. This town had more smoke and mirrors than a strip club locker room.”
“I’d been stuck in the past so long I’d forgotten what year is was.”
“It was Monday afternoon and I’d already been thrown out of a party, been to a strip club and got into a bar fight. This latest mid-life crisis was certainly ticking all the boxes.”
“This kind of place made me want to puke. I needed a real drink to cope with the electronic music and robotic people” – on entering a nightclub.
“There was a bar ahead. The irony wasn’t lost on me. I figured sobriety was no used to me if I was dead.”
““Sao Paulo is like Bagdad with G-strings”
“There must have been another way out through the VIP lounge. Rich fools love a private exit.”
“I stood out in this place like a street walker in a monastery” at a party in a shanty town in Brazil.
“These bastards made the NYPD look like the Hari Krishnas.”
“Do you think a pile of shit feels popular because it’s surrounded by flies?”
“When you’re stuck in a foreign country and don’t know the words for “reverse charges” and you’re in some lonely skin joint in the middle of some poor slum and just had every last cent robbed from you and you call yourself a bodyguard then you know you’re a loser.
“First day off the sauce and somehow I’d still ended up in the gutter.” – after being robbed by a gang of thugs.
“I’d been sitting at the bar for three hours, or five hours depending on the way you looked at things.”
“The way I see it there’s two types of people, those who spend their lives trying to build a future and those who spend their lives trying to rebuild the past. For too long I’d be stuck in between, hidden in the dark. What was I really doing walking in there with my bad haircut and ridiculous shirt? – gatecrashing a party dressed in Bermuda shirt.